For those of you just joining us, we’ve been discussing the fine points of Scenes and Sequels for the last few days. I have covered the basics in my article on Writing the Perfect Scene, but a number of questions have come up that need answering.
As an amusing side note, try Googling the phrase “Scenes and Sequels” and see what you come up with.
Vennessa wrote:
Just one request, if possible. Could you please show us an example from one of your books where you deal with one character’s Scene and another character’s Sequel at the same time? I’m a visual learner; I like examples I can study rather than just instruction.
Randy sez: Yes, I’ll be happy to do that. I’ll choose one of my books at random, DOUBLE VISION. I’ll analyze Chapter two, which has two Scenes and one Sequel.
Let me give you a little backstory. Chapter one starts out with our heroine, Keryn, being summoned to work on a Saturday for an emergency meeting. Keryn is CFO of the company and is romantically interested in one of the engineers at work, our hero Dillon, who is a very nice guy, a technical genius, but not socially adept. Keryn and Dillon had their first date last night, and it went OK but he and she have very different ideas of their relationship at this point. (Keryn has high hopes; Dillon is blissfully unaware that they even HAVE a relationship.) When Keryn arrives at work, she finds Dillon talking with the company CEO and with a hot young blonde airhead who appears to be overly interested in Dillon.
With that background, we analyze the next two scenes, both of which are Scenes, but told from different POVs.
Scene 1, from Keryn’s POV: This is a short Scene. Keryn’s Goal is to find out who this airhead is and get her to back off from Dillon. There is a short bit of Conflict in which Keryn learns that the airhead is a new employee for the company. Keryn is miffed at this, because the company is in financial straits and it’s her job to keep the books balanced. Why the heck has a new employee been hired without her permission? The Disaster comes when the CEO tells Keryn that the airhead is no airhead at all–she’s a brilliant biophysicist who has made a remarkable discovery. Clearly, she is just the kind of genius who might be able to interest Dillon in a way that Keryn never can.
Scene 2, from Dillon’s POV: This is a much longer Scene that follows immediately. Dillon knows that the company is having problems; his Goal is to solve the problem. The Conflict comes when the CEO reveals that one of their customers is backing out of a recent sale. The Disaster is that the company’s “angel investors” have set specific sales requirements for the company, and now those requirements have not been met. This means that the investors will refuse to continue pumping money into the company and it is almost certain to go broke. They are facing bankruptcy and layoffs.
This scene is at the same time a Sequel for Keryn, who is sitting next to Dillon not saying much. The reader knows that Keryn is dying to know who this blonde is. However, we’re in Dillon’s head, who is blissfully unaware of Keryn’s Reaction (jealousy) and her Dilemma (what to do about the blonde). So the content of Keryn’s Sequel is left for the reader to guess at, mostly. This is fair, because Keryn’s love life is NOT the main story of the book.
Scene 3 of the chapter continues in Dillon’s POV and it’s a Sequel. The Reaction in the group is fear at the possibility of layoffs. However, there is a possible way out. The blonde “airhead” is a recent Caltech Ph.D. named Rachel, and she has just developed the heart of a quantum computer that could save the companie’s cookies–once it can be shown to work. But Rachel needs help to complete the project, and Dillon has exactly the skills and the technical brilliance to do the job. The Dilemma is whether to tell the truth to the other employees (who will almost certainly start sending out resumes the instant they hear the company is in trouble) or whether to keep quiet and try to get the new device built before the next payroll comes due (at which point all hell will break loose when the company can’t meet payroll). The Decision is that Dillon will work around the clock with Rachel at a secret off-site location to see if possibly they can solve the problem before the whole company comes unglued.
Note that the above Sequel would be a Scene if it were shown from Keryn’s POV, since it’s a Disaster for her romantic hopes to have Dillon working so closely with hot-to-trot Rachel for the next few weeks.
Why did I write this as a Sequel (in Dillon’s POV) rather than as a Scene (in Keryn’s POV)? Simply because the main storyline is about the quantum computer. Keryn’s love life is a subplot. This early in the book, I felt it better to work the main storyline, even in Sequel, rather than Keryn’s subplot in Scene.
A side note: I used to work in a small high-tech company not too unlike the one in this story. I actually set the location of the fictional company right next door to the one I worked at. If my storyline shows some antipathy for “angel investors,” it may be because I don’t think they’re all angels.
*click*
Thank you, Randy. 🙂
I might have to read this book. It’s on my bookshelf . . .
You’ve shown us that we can choose to make a scene (in all fairness, some can’t help it) or a sequel out of a given portion of storyline.
At what stage of planning or writing do Scene/Sequel begin to take shape? Is it in the early plotting, so that you’re sure to include the 3 elements of Scene or Sequel before you ever write?
Is it after you’ve laid out a basic storyline? Or is it while you write & flesh out the story?
Camille Says:
At what stage of planning or writing do Scene/Sequel begin to take shape?
Me sez: This might be a personal choice thing. Some writers need structure to get their story down, others are seat-of-the-pants writers who don’t do much plotting.
I need structure before I can begin to write. It really helped me last week to look at each scene I was about to write and lay out my G/C/D or R/D/D before I started. It gave me a map to go by. I’ll add that I wrote more last week than I had in a year. So for me, it worked to have the S&S set out from the start.
SOTP writers seem to get stifled by too much structure. They just want to go with the flow and get the story down. And that is fine. You can always go back once the story is written and fine tune each scene into a Scene or Sequel.
Personally I think you have to be constantly aware (consciously or subconsiously) of the structur of what you’re writing and if it fits into the Scene or Sequel structure.
If you have to go back and edit something into a Scene or a Sequel, good luck. I don’t see that happening without major rewrites, unless you’re already writing Scenes and Sequels without realizing it.
IMO, if you edit your draft and find pieces that are not Scene or Sequel, you best consider just scrapping that part since it probably doesn’t advance your plot. It’ll just be sitting there taking up space and not giving your reader the Powerful Emotional Experience Randy talks about. Obviously you can always edit it, but it might not be worth keeping. (My opinion of course)
As a side note, I’m practicing remembering a few key elements about writing fiction as I work on improving my craft. One of these things is the Powerful Emotional Experience Randy mentions. I try to be aware of that every time I write.
My ultimate goal is that readers will not be able to put my novel down, that they have to keep the pages turning. So much so that they will eventually almost pee their pants.
I’m beginning to suspect Randy had ulterior motive in chosing the name for Powerful Emotional Experience (Acronym = PEE).
(heaves a heavy sigh)
I started off this story with an ending in my head and some stepping stones to get there. Then I took a running start by the seat-o-my jeans. Then I realized there were issues I didn’t know how to deal with. Finding Randy’s AFW 3 months ago was an answer to prayer.
In that time I’ve learned more than my head can contain and now, my story is taking a half-time break. (Thanks to everyone on this blog, the half-time show has been riveting.)
My entire story is laid out nicely, thanks to Randy’s spreadsheet example. At this point, I want to go back over the 1st half with S&S in mind and revise or scrap, as Christophe mentioned. I also want to move forward across the skeleton I have in place with what I’ve learned, which I look forward to. Thanks Vennessa, by the way… good tips.
So now I don’t know what to do. I want to go backward and forward at the same time. (sigh) I can already hear the Master say it… “Only YOU can make that decision, grasshoppah.” And probably something equally profound, like ‘wherever you go, there you will truly be’.
Maybe I will try to edit one chapter, write a new chapter, etc. We shall see.
Thanks Randy & everyone here. What a huge blessing this place has been!
Excellent example, Randy. Double Vision was a work of sheer genius. (Shame on you, Nessie, for not having read it!) But I expect nothing less from you.
Godspeed.
wow this is a detailed post! Thanks for all your hard work Randy!!
I have some questions. I’m just starting to get my head around this scene/sequel thing. However, taking it to my WIP, I can see that I’m either misinterpreting how this works in my own work or I’m doing it all wrong. My prologue seems to be more a sequel then a scene (can that work?). And then I have a chapter in which the POV character has a goal and a conflict, but the disaster isn’t really a disaster for the POV heroine but for her antagonist. Does it have to be the character with the goal that has the disaster?
Camille Says: So now I don’t know what to do. I want to go backward and forward at the same time.
Me sez: I’m a bit the same way at the moment. I want to progress my current wip, but I know there are some major revisions needed at the start, especially with my character motivations. I also know which chapters are heading for the scrap heap. Oh, the agony of throwing out much sweat overed words. But I know the story will be so much tighter and better without those chapters.
Karri Says: (Shame on you, Nessie, for not having read it!) But I expect nothing less from you.
Me sez: Hehe. Take away the first two sentences and look what you have left? *pokes Karri*
Diane Says: And then I have a chapter in which the POV character has a goal and a conflict, but the disaster isn’t really a disaster for the POV heroine but for her antagonist. Does it have to be the character with the goal that has the disaster?
Me sez: I’d say yes. It is all part of the Powerful Emotional Experience. You are drawing us into one character’s head, showing us her goal and conflict. If you switch the disaster to the antagonist, how does this keep our emotions tied to the heroine? If the disaster is the antagonist’s, doesn’t that mean the heroine has succeeded with her goal, or is at least on an even emotional level? What will keep the reader turning the page if the heroine isn’t suddenly thrust into a new area of conflict? Perhaps you need to look at the POV of the scene. Would the scene be better shown through the antagonist if he is the one who is faced with a disaster? Just my thoughts. 🙂
Diane says,
My prologue seems to be more a sequel then a scene (can that work?).
I say,
I don’t see why that’s a problem, though keep in mind that usually the Scene is more active than the Sequel. So it could be more gripping for the reader to start with some action. On the other hand, starting with a Sequel puts you right into your protagonist’s head, letting the reader bond with him or her much faster.
In my opinion, I don’t see why a Sequel couldn’t be the start of a novel.
Diane Says,
And then I have a chapter in which the POV character has a goal and a conflict, but the disaster isn’t really a disaster for the POV heroine but for her antagonist. Does it have to be the character with the goal that has the disaster?
Venessa sez,
I’d say yes. It is all part of the Powerful Emotional Experience. You are drawing us into one character’s head, showing us her goal and conflict. If you switch the disaster to the antagonist, how does this keep our emotions tied to the heroine? If the disaster is the antagonist’s, doesn’t that mean the heroine has succeeded with her goal, or is at least on an even emotional level? What will keep the reader turning the page if the heroine isn’t suddenly thrust into a new area of conflict? Perhaps you need to look at the POV of the scene. Would the scene be better shown through the antagonist if he is the one who is faced with a disaster? Just my thoughts.
I say,
I agree with Venessa. Choose your POV wisely. You can get inside the antagonist’s head in some scenes, but if you have to choose between the protagonist and the antagonist, go with the first. You want your readers to root for the good guy, not the bad guy.
Hi there! I feel I should introduce myself before I comment. I’m Henny, and I came to Randy’s AFW site… uh… some months ago through a link someone sent me on Writing the Perfect Scene. Where better for me to dive in than this particular blog post? So…
Venessa says: This might be a personal choice thing. Some writers need structure to get their story down, others are seat-of-the-pants writers who don’t do much plotting.
I need structure before I can begin to write.
I say: I’ve just put aside my first novel, unfinished, because it was un-planned. I know this deep down. I had the exposition, conflict, characters, and oh, the backstory! Around the time I was admitting to myself that my wip was falling apart, I started reading Randy’s Snowflake Method. It just made so much sense. I’ve made a start on mapping out the story line using the method, and I can actually see this one coming together with an inevitable resolution. I’m writing the character profiles as I go, and taking cues from their individual story lines as I work out the bigger picture. In short, Venessa, I find I’m like you – I need structure before I can begin to write.
However… (keep going, I’m nearly there :))
Camille Says:
At what stage of planning or writing do Scene/Sequel begin to take shape?
I say: I’m not sure I could also plan scenes and sequels at the level Randy demonstrates in his post at the mapping-out stage. One reason is that I’m such a nit-picker, I’ve told myself the only way to get this one finshed is to allow myself to write badly until the job’s done. Consequentially there will be need to be some re-writing, and it is at this stage that I expect to be able to establish the scene and sequel pattern.
But who knows, I might find that at least at some level I have the capacity to work it in at the planning stage.
Okay, done now.
I thank you. 🙂
I think I scared everyone away…
Including Randy . . .
Think he will post tonight?
I think he’s busy on his E-Zine issue of this month.
True, we are about due another.
While I’m here, I might as well comment on this:
Christophe said: You want your readers to root for the good guy, not the bad guy.
I agree, but I think it is also important to get into the antagonists head when given the chance. Antagonists aren’t all bad, and in their own mind they think their actions are right. Understanding the antagonist’s motivations can really up the suspense and add layering to a plot, in my humble opinion.
Agreed. I meant that if you have to choose between putting the POV of the protagonist or the antagonist on paper, then go for the protagonist. But in any other case, it’s indeed worth to get into the antagonist’s head once in a while.
That’s still something I’m having a bit of trouble with. I tend to make my bad guys all bad. I realize it and adjust, but the urge is still there.
What is an Averse scene?
I learn scene/sequel in a different way.
Scene will have: goal-conflict -disaster
but sequel is: emotion-thought-decision-action.
Is this scheme very different from yours?
Agreed
Thanx but it was the wrong book